Sunday, December 13, 2009

There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you its going to be a butterfly

There's nothing in a caterpillar that tells you that its going to be a butterfly.
- Buckminister Fuller
I had recently attended a workshop for children, in which they stressed the need for 'Value education'. While the academic education we pursue, fill our minds with knowledge, value education helps mould the inner personality of a person. While the outward dress does create the first impression, to 'hold' the attention it requires the strength of character.
A nice story was narrated, as to in a school, there was a class of very naughty and rowdy children. A person visited the class and observing the behaviour of the children said that the kids are going to grow up to be gangsters and wastrels. A few years later, as the person inquired he was surprised to see the same class students had turned out to be doctors, lawyers, accountants etc. He approached many of them to know the reason for their transformation and they attributed it to one particular teacher. He located the teacher, who by that time had grown quite old, and asked her 'what did you teach the students that there was so much of a transformation in them'. The teacher had difficulty remembering the class, and finally recollected and said, 'that class students... Oh I loved them'.
During the first 5-7 years the children are very impressionable and it is possible to mould them into good human beings. Like during the making of a chappati/ bread, it is possible to mould and make changes in the dough; if we add more water the chappati/bread will be soggy and if we add less water it will dry. It is only through experience that we know how much water is to be added; but once the chappati/bread is made/ baked we cannot change it. It is only during the dough stage that moulding and changing is possible. So this stage is very important. The basic idea of good habit forming must be done in this age. Old habits are hard to break and the further personality of the person is built on the values imbibed during child hood; not just by the parents, but also by the teachers and students in whose company the child is. Also the values taught by the teacher in the school must be compatible with the values taught at home. For eg if in the school the teacher tells a student that you must not tell lies, don't ignore his harmless lies at home.
If you take a container and fill it with marbles, you will see that it is 'full'. There is not any space for more. Try adding some semolina, it will slip into the gaps of the marbles and fit in smugly. Now the container is really full, or is it? Try adding some water. And yes, it will seep in it too. The marbles are the 'duties', the semolina is the daily 'routine tasks' that have to be done with and the water is 'play and fun activities'. So the most essential thing in life is to prioritize your important activities. If you fill the container with semolina first, there will be no space for marbles. So encourage your child to fit in all activities in a day, by prioritizing the important and the not so important ones.
And finally,
What you hear...... you forget
What you see....... you can recollect
What you do........ you never forget.
It is better to teach a children showing pictures and giving real life examples where possible, where it is imprinted in the memory of the child. If you can make your child do something himself, there's nothing like it. As the brain can recollect better in pictures, than simply giving a dry lecture which is easily forgotten. And remember value education begins from birth. So start now..

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Why do people love me so much...

Why do people love me so much; that they get so obssessive and possessive about me, wondered I...

Maybe I am sounding a bit pompous and self centered, but many a times in our lives we are surrounded with people who love us so much, that we are overwhelmed. Our parents, spouse, kids and close friends and relatives. Sometimes, the love may be a bit too possessive, especially when it comes to your child who'd love to be around you 24*7 and hates the thought of anyone else talking to you and taking you away from him.
I guess the protective love from our parents is the most purest form of Love. Its simply giving without expecting anything back in return. Sometimes looking back I feel guilty for taking their Love for granted. Today, having matured with age, I have learnt to give back love to them. I look at my son and I see history repeating itself.
To my thinking, the love in friendship is the most easy going one. Most of the time its mutual among close friends and they are the people we always confide in the thoughts and feelings that we cannot tell anyone else. They say blood is thicker than water, but down the walk of life I have forged some really close relationships with some non- blood relatives, so much that I consider them my soulmates. They are my life line and I lean back on them as they can give me some unbiased advice when I need it.
Finally, I guess if you are lucky enough (I am, touchwood!!) the love of a spouse is what completes the circle of your Love. Here's a nice poem summing the love (by Laura Veronica Merodio)

A stranger you were once.
Then, with a gentle look you took my hand.
As our lives engaged,
you lit my life and I held both your hands.
Now that decades have passed,
ours souls have indeed become one.
How fortunate we are
that we have found the love so true
that everyone dreams about.

Finally summing up, as F.P Jones has said, 'Love doesn't make the world go round. Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.'

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Beautiful thoughts

1) Don't aim for success if you want it;
just do what you love and believe in,
and it will come naturally

2) You may get delayed to reach your targets.
But every step you take towards your targets is equal to victory.

3) "An aim in life is the only fortune worth finding,
and it is not to be found in
foreign lands, but in the heart itself."- Robert Louis

4 Today well lived makes every
yesterday - a dream of happiness
and tomorrow - a vision of hope

5) The summit of happiness is reached
when a person is ready to be what he is.

6) In between goals is a thing called life,
that has to be lived and enjoyed.

7)"People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking
that they can do things.
When they belive in themselves they have the first secret of success."

8)If you find stumbling blocks in your path,
use them as stepping stones to move close to the good in life.

9) All changes are difficult and sometimes costly,
but if they're good changes,
in the long run they pay off.

10) Life Consists not in Holding Good Cards
but in Playing Well Those You Hold.

11)Every king was once a helpless baby,
every oak once an corn,
every mighty ocean swell once a ripple,
and every great structure once a blueprint.
It's not where you are today,
but where you are going that counts.

12) Without your involvement you can't succeed.
With your involvement you can't fail.

13) Happiness is a perfume
you cannot spread on others without getting a few drops on you yourself.
so always be happy to make other happy!

14) 'Challenges'
are what makes life interesting
them is what makes life meaningful.

15) The toughest part of getting to the top of the ladder,
is getting through the ground at the bottom.