Thursday, April 22, 2010

Some Important Laws Which Newton Forgot to State

LAW OF QUEUE: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

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LAW OF TELEPHONE: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged one.

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LAW OF MECHANICAL REPAIR : After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.

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LAW OF THE WORKSHOP: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

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LAW OF THE ALIBI: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.

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BATH THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.

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LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

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LAW OF THE RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!

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LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

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THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.

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LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

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Friday, April 2, 2010

BEING ADOPTED

Teacher Debbie Moon’s first graders were discussing a picture of a family.
One little boy in the picture had a different colour hair than the other family members. One child suggested that he was adopted and a little girl named Jocelynn Jay said, “I know all about adoptions because I was adopted.”
“What does it mean to be adopted?” asked another child.
“It means,” said Jocelynn, “that you grew in your mommy’s heart instead of her tummy”.

The happiest of people don’t necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.